Sunday, January 6, 2013

Charlotte Bronte - Jane Eyre II

"It should be retitled Jane Crap"

"As soon as I started to read Jane Eyre, it bored me to the point where I gave up on it initially. So I threw it in the DANG PIT! xD"

"Ruining women since 1847."

"So very boring I very went into a coma. This was so boring I wept
This book made me cringe. I have not been this let down in ways I could not even comply bivieve."

"The only reason I enjoyed this book was because I could bash the hell out of this supposed 'feminist novel'. If she really were a feminist she would've kept her freedom instead of marrying a man who got all of her money when she married him.
Sure she had the freedom to choose, but if she truly wanted to make an example of feminism, you don't marry a guy who knows you just inhereted a fortune.
Did anyone notice that Rochester asked her to marry him after he found out she inherited money? Huh? Mum, the English-major, didn't, but I was more than happy to point it out XD"


"Of Interest to Preteen Girls
Oh, how Jane Eyre was such a boring read! But, of course, I've never been a little girl, the target audience for this story. It reads like a diary, without the 'Dear diary, ...'"

"It saddens me to think such a work of complete and utter rubbish can be marked as a classic. It is a HORRIBLE book and I truly hope that some day soon people will not be forced to endure the torture of having to read this work of trash. The only good thing that came from it was that it put me to sleep so much I have never been more well rested."

"I hate Jane Eyre. The guy doesn't fall for her until he's terribly disfigured-come on!"

I was forced to read this for english because apparently that's what it takes to be somebody in life. (Sarcasm at its finest.) I would rather stare at a Big Mac than read this book, and I can't stand McDonalds. Obviously, no one will read this book for pleasure, or at least no one I want to know. It's your money. Do what you want with it."

"While sloshing through the almost unreadable text of the verbose Charlotte Bronte, one can imagine why she was never married. Don't get us wrong, it's not that we don't understand the underlying themes and the higher level concepts; they just contain absolutely no relevance whatsoever. The plot, dare we call it that, winds slowly through the 400+ pages of this so-called classic. If you must read it for school-don't. You'd be better off guessing on the test than being utterly confused and bored to tears."

"There has never been, and will never be, a worse book
Endless, pointless description. DESCRIPTION, DESCRIPTION, DESCRIPTION!!! The entire book is written in stupid metaphors. The few places where there is actually any dialogue bore the reader to tears. Honestly, i think that this is dubbed a classic simply because it is older than sand. Gee, maybe if I just go out and slop a few words down on a piece of paper, it'll be a classic in 160 years! It'll be required of every high school sophomore, like this idiotic 'story.' Excuse me now, I'm off to begin my masterpiece. I'm sure it'll be better than this."

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