Monday, April 29, 2013

THE BEST OF APRIL

CARROLL - ALICE'S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND

"As an English teacher, this might come as a rather surprising view. I could not find a deeper layer of meaning to the novel & really my impressions sum up to this: CS Lewis was on drugs when he wrote it, CS Lewis had a fascination with narcotics (the constant shrinking, growing, sniffing, references to mushrooms), CS Lewis could be interpreted as a peodophile (controversial I know but there's room for interpretation), the plot & characters lack depth neither do they make sense :(.

I'm baffled as to why this is a classic. I even went in sparknotes to see what analysis was written and interpretations made; for me they are rather far-fetched & personally applied poorly. But hey, maybe you need to be stoned to appreciate this or a different kind of 'intellectual'."


NIETZSCHE - THE ANTI-CHRIST

"Would you say 'Santa Cluas is dead' or 'the Easter Bunny is dead'? No. God will never die because you can’t kill imagination and God is the king of the imaginarium."


MENANDER - SAMIA

"for all their sophistication in philosophy, law, and the arts--they were a failed people ... HOW WAS THIS STUFF POPULAR?"


ELIOT - THE WASTE LAND

"The web page assignment was the most difficult thing I have had to endure during my time as an English major ... I think I hate poetry. But, more than I hate poetry I hate T.S. Eliot and that James Joyce story was the most boring story I have ever read in my life. I don't understand Eliot and nothing happens, whatsoever, in The Dead."


JOYCE - A PORTRAIT OF THE ARTIST AS A YOUNG MAN

"It was SO WHINY. Poor me, poor me, blah blah blah ... James Joyce doesn’t write because he likes to write. James Joyce writes because he likes to make lit students suffer when they try to puzzle out what the hell he means. This, friends, is not art. This is evil, pure and simple. And that is why I hate A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man ... I am placing much of the blame on my AP Literature teacher from my senior year of high school. First of all, she was really short (possibly less than 5 feet)"


SHAKESPEARE - THE TAMING OF THE SHREW

"of course Shakespeare isn’t known for having written female characters particularly well ... there’s no one in his work that measures up to Antigone, Cassandra or Euripides’ version of Elecktra."

"Person: Oh my God, I just love Shakespeare!
Me: Ew, why?
Person: Because he captures my emotions in such a poetic way.
Me: John Green does the same thing and you don't need to translate his words in order to read his works, let alone enjoy them."


WHITEHEAD - THE CONCEPT OF NATURE

"Science will one day make philosophy obsolete when the human condition is finally understood"

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Alfred North Whitehead - The Concept of Nature

"Science will one day make philosophy obsolete when the human condition is finally understood"


"There's a real jealously philosophers have for scientists because science does what philosophy can only dream of: Making absolute statements backed up by hard, empirical evidence."


"Philosophy is Always Wrong, Strives to be Always Wrong, Strives to Be Useless, has no Social Use, is Impossible to Understand, is Always Right, is totally contradictory, Strives to be as Contradictory and Confusing and Illogical as Possible, accepts all kinds of logical contradictions, strives to be as contradictory, chaotic and messed up as possible, lets you invent all you want, just because, for fun, and this very sentence is totally false and wrong, you are allowed to lie intentionally in philosophy, you are allowed to deceive and confuse, you are allowed to do anything you want as the person performing the act of philosophy is just playing games and wants to have fun, etc. in other words BE YOUR OWN BOSS
...
philosophy will invent a new explanation for everything, a new kind of mathematics made up of the manipulation of words instead of quantities, such as 'the square root of the word 'thought' is equal to 'space' multiplied 'mountain' divided by 'electron'' and such; And also any sequence of symbols meaning anything as deep as possible, infinitely deep such as £$H$%H%H&%H&&
...
There are no constraints in philosophy, you can say anything you want, do anything you want, associate anything you want, etc. It is outside of any possible reference system, any stage with respect to any ground point (comparison and measurement events) of any Measuring Device ... Philosophy cannot be communicated in any way to anyone, it is a completely 100 % subjective personal experience without any possibility of being communicated (not even to itself or the person thinking the philosophy), it is the pure breakdown of communication, even of communication of the philosopher with himself, there are no longer any symbols or thought paths or delimitations that can contain its contents, etc."

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Shakespeare - The Taming of the Shrew II

"When the younger sister gets married we see her true colors as she turns out like her sister, a loud mouth."


"Of all the assholes shakespeare wrote about, Petruchio is by far the worse ... And I totally get the whole being a strong independent woman who doesn't need a man thing... but WHOA. Katherina is one bad bitch. And not in a good way."


"On the one hand I understand that it isn't appropriate for Katherine to be abusive to him, but using abuse to make her complacent is also not appropriate. But after reading what was going on during the time of Shakespeare, I understand his point of view."


"I can forgive the misogyny considering when the play was written but I have a very hard time forgiving the slapstick."


"The Taming of the Shrew was easy to understand than most of Shakespeare's novels. In contrast to 10 things i hate about you."


"The women in Shakespeare's comedies are so empty and flat."


"Reading a play is difficult, to say the least"


"there were a few crude sayings and apparent uses of the Lord's name in vain."


"This one should be forgotten as crap from history not worth reading in the modern day."


"I found this story to be extremely elementary. This Shakespeare fellow obviously has no idea what he is talking about"


"As for Taming of the Shrew, I read it as a tragedy: the destruction of a real, living, thinking, churlish woman. The brilliance of Shakespeare is such that one can make that reading, even though he himself was a patriarchal asshole who saw the whole thing as a joke."


"The title alone is cause for hatred.
The whole idea of 'taming' any living creature is quite bothersome in fact."


"of course Shakespeare isn’t known for having written female characters particularly well ... there’s no one in his work that measures up to Antigone, Cassandra or Euripides’ version of Elecktra."


" fuck you shakespeare cause i hate taming of the shrew and i have to read for the 2nd time.

*flips off lit department*"


"Person: Oh my God, I just love Shakespeare!
Me: Ew, why?
Person: Because he captures my emotions in such a poetic way.
Me: John Green does the same thing and you don't need to translate his words in order to read his works, let alone enjoy them."

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Shakespeare - The Taming of the Shrew

"I think this book is a little difficult because they say to many hard and different words to understand how they said it in the time of year."


"Other than this book being a pain, and a horrible old english text. This book was one of the best by Willian Shakespeare."


"i didnt like this book because it was so hard to read and so annoying and hurt to understand what was happening so i hope we dont read more sahakespare because its hurt."


"i hated this book because the words were to deficult to read and just to understanding the book was to hard for me."


"Every woman and wife should read this. The importance of being feminine, kind and gracious to our husbands."


"This book in the Lake Illustrated Classics series is like Shakespeare, without all the pesky Shakespeare."


"the moral of the story is to tame your wife so she does whatever you want her to do"


"If it weren't for the fact that the girl they are trying to 'tame' didn't have much dialogue in the play, and actually SHOWED more resentment/disrespect, etc. for men, I'd see why this 'taming' would be needed."


"i can't get over the blatant sexism of shakespeare in this play. his chauvinism is so great, and so ignorant, that i'm tempted to question his overall intelligence."


"When Shakespeare wrote this, it was obviously a very different time. (Heck, it was like 5 centuries ago, when women were probably traded for goats, so I guess maybe this was forward thinking, at the time...) While some parts of this play were somewhat amusing, I just hate all of the dressing up in disguises that always seems to happen in any of Shakespeare's plays. But maybe that's how people got their kicks back in the day.. Dressed up and pretended to be someone else until they got caught. 'You idiot, its me, Carl. I can't believe all I had to do was put on a dress and say I was Susy to get you to believe me!!' Or dress up random drunks when they're sleeping to try to get them to think they're someone else, like in this play. "Hmm... I'm pretty sure before I passed out drunk I was wearing a lot rattier clothes, and people called me Sly. Wait, you say I'm a Prince?? And I'm rich?? Are you sure? Well you're right, I AM wearing nice clothes now. That SETTLES it! I MUST be someone else!" How does everyone fall for all of these tricks?? It's like the 1500s were all just a bunch of Bosom Buddies episodes."


"It's not so much a romantic comedy as a guide on how to torture your wife to force her to submit to your every whim."


"it’s hard to believe that Shakespeare, penner of such sensational heroines as Juliet and Viola, could ever produce this sexist drivel."

IT IS HARD TO BELIEVE! WHICH IS WHY WE SHOULDN'T BELIEVE IT WITHOUT THINKING ABOUT IT CAREFULLY, PREFERABLY IN THE CONTEXT OF URBANIZATION AND THE CHANGING ROLE OF MARRIAGE IN 16TH-CENTURY ENGLAND. PUT VERY BRIEFLY AND OVER-SIMPLY, THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE NUCLEAR FAMILY AND THE URBAN ECONOMY CHANGED THE PURPOSE OF MARRIAGE. AT THE BEGINNING OF THE 16TH CENTURY IN ENGLAND, MARRIAGE WAS AN INSTITUTION THAT HAD VERY LITTLE TO DO WITH ROMANTIC LOVE. FOR THE MIDDLE AND LOWER CLASSES, IT WAS ESSENTIALLY A PRACTICAL PARTNERSHIP IN THE AGRICULTURAL WORK OF THE LARGE CLAN-STYLE HOUSEHOLD OF THE MEDIEVAL PERIOD. BUT IN THE GROWING CITIES THERE WAS NO OPPORTUNITY FOR RESPECTABLE WOMEN TO WORK OUTSIDE THE HOME--THE WIFE, HAVING NO LABOUR TO OFFER HER HUSBAND, WAS TRANSFORMED INTO AN ACQUISITION AND STATUS SYMBOL. MARRIAGE, FOR MEN AND WOMEN, WAS A GAME OF SOCIAL CLIMBING, PLAYED WITH DOWRIES AND LAVISH DISPLAYS OF BORROWED WEALTH. ONCE MARRIED, THE WIFE'S ROLE WAS RESTRICTED TO CHILD-BEARING AND MANAGING THE HOUSEHOLD. THIS IS THE NOVEL SOCIAL SITUATION UPON WHICH TAMING IS AN EXTENDED COMMENT. IT'S SHAKESPEARE'S BIRTHDAY TODAY, SO I WILL BREAK CONVENTION BY POSTING A DEFENSE OF THE PLAY, FROM GERMAINE GREER'S THE FEMALE EUNUCH, WHICH I THINK GETS TO THE HEART OF THIS SUBTLE COMEDY:

"Kate is a woman striving for her own existence in a world where she is a stale, a decoy to be bid for against her sister’s higher market value, so she opts out by becoming unmanageable, a scold. Bianca has found the women’s way of guile and feigned gentleness to pay better dividends: she woos for herself under false colours, manipulating her father and her suitors in a perilous game which could end in her ruin. Kate courts ruin in a different way, but she has the uncommon good fortune to find Petruchio, who is man enough to know what he wants and how to get it. He wants her spirit and her energy because he wants a wife worth keeping. He tames her like he might a hawk or a high-mettled horse, and she rewards him with strong sexual love and fierce loyalty. Lucentio finds himself saddled with a cold, disloyal woman, who has no objection to humiliating him in public. The submission of a woman like Kate is genuine and exciting because she has something to lay down, her virgin pride and individuality: Bianca is the soul of duplicity, married without earnestness or good will. Kate’s speech at the close of the play is the greatest defence of Christian monogamy ever written. It rests upon the role of a husband as protector and friend, and it is valid because Kate has a man who is capable of being both, for Petruchio is both gentle and strong (it is a vile distortion of the play to have him strike her ever). The message is probably twofold: only Kates make good wives, and then only to Petruchios; for the rest, their cake is dough."

Sunday, April 21, 2013

James Joyce - A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man II

"No Joyce, just no."


"Okay, maybe it's just me, but I really really do not like Modernism stream of consciousness. It makes no sense to me. Okay, maybe it would be fun for the author to write something in his stream of consciousness, but honestly it's not going to make any sense to someone who does not have the same consciousness! So yeah, I guess this book is really artistic in how he's portraying his artsyness, but to everybody else who does not share that consciousness, we are all left completely lost. I had a really hard time trying to follow his thinking. A lot of it was really dry and boring and the whole book dragged from start to finish.
This is just my opinion of course. I'm really not accustomed to this style of writing and maybe if I took more time, I would appreciate it more. But I still don't like it and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone who actually enjoys reading."


"done, finally. still don't get it. i s his head in the clouds or is he just wacked?"


"I fantasize about inventing a time machine simply for the sole purpose of beating James Joyce over the head repeatedly with a hardbound copy of this book while shouting 'STREAM...OF...CONSCIOUSNESS...MY...A$$!'"


"It is amazing what they make you read in literature classes, especially when there are so many good books out there. This book was pompous, annoying and offensive. There was nothing to it and no reason I could see in reading it other than to know that there are some ramblings that shouldn't be published. The majority of books I've read in my literature classes have been disappointing, offensive or just plain boring. It's too bad we can't read something exciting, interesting and thought provoking."


"Fuck this flowery bull shit. I felt like a tool for not liking this. The next book I read was POST OFFICE by Bukowski. I felt vindicated to say the least. Great for insomnia, little else. I guess you can give him some props for starting that whole 'writing for writings sake' thing and babbling on about nothing. Kerouac did well with that artistic idea. But JOYCE'S writing style is way overdone and pretentious and the setting/subject, ughhh, boring. No thank you. Too old school, it just doesn't register with me. I like stories about drug addicts and depressed ass holes. This was just about the most boring shit I ever read. Couldn't even bring myself to finish it."


"Okay, so famous Irish author James Joyce is on every Great Books list ever published. Ulysses, Finnegan's Wake, Portrait of the Artist as A Young Man...they're all praised and renowned, and on college reading lists for the educated student, and all this other shit.

Here's the thing though: James Joyce SUCKS."


"Joyce and I are so NOT friends! Do you get people looking at you with pity when you tell them you don't like him, as though you just aren't smart enough to 'get' him? I 'get' him alright-I just think he's awful!"


"It was SO WHINY. Poor me, poor me, blah blah blah ... James Joyce doesn’t write because he likes to write. James Joyce writes because he likes to make lit students suffer when they try to puzzle out what the hell he means. This, friends, is not art. This is evil, pure and simple. And that is why I hate A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man ... I am placing much of the blame on my AP Literature teacher from my senior year of high school. First of all, she was really short (possibly less than 5 feet)"

Friday, April 19, 2013

Terence - Andria

"Terence sucks (-:"


"Terence sucks ass"


"terence sucks penis"


"I DON'T LIKE TERENCE. HIS IS OVER SMART."


"SUCH TEDIUM DEAR GOD"


"I think I remember that Hitler’s Third Reich vision was partially based on the Roman Empire."

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

T. S. Eliot - The Waste Land II

"I am going to KILL TS Eliot when I die. And then I'm gonna kill him again.

The guy's a poetic elitest!! 'Oh, hey, I think I'll switch into french/german/some other language right now!' Yeah, right before I smash your head open with a barbecue and stab your eyes out with my mother's brooch."


"What kind of runny piece of shit writes a poem you need footnotes for; not only 80-plus years after the fact, but the fucking day it's fucking published?"


"This is a very difficult poem to read, as it is not a standard rhyming stanza set."


"I hate T S Eliot. I hated studying his stupid nonsensical poem. Lets have a burnin'"


"People not in literature will never be asked to read TWL, and if asked they should refuse. It's like sailing a frickin' boat around the frickin' world, for God's sake: if you're not a sailor there's no reason good enough to do it."


"T. S. Eliot was the very first pseudo-intellectual emo kid."


"i hate t.s. eliot. the wasteland is the most useless writing ever since no one in the world can understand it unless they want to spend a month deciphering it."


"The web page assignment was the most difficult thing I have had to endure during my time as an English major ... I think I hate poetry. But, more than I hate poetry I hate T.S. Eliot and that James Joyce story was the most boring story I have ever read in my life. I don't understand Eliot and nothing happens, whatsoever, in The Dead."


"I hate T. S. Eliot now that I have to write about his old ass!"

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Menander - Samia

"incredibly formulaic."


"for all their sophistication in philosophy, law, and the arts--they were a failed people ... HOW WAS THIS STUFF POPULAR?"


"I guess I can appreciate this on some level but that doesn't make reading it any less painful."


"naive what it does show is how far comedy has come with such modern works as Faulty Towers ... comedy has come a long way"

Monday, April 8, 2013

Friedrich Nietzsche - The Anti-Christ II

"It may appear that Nietzsche loved Jesus ... But what Nietzsche does not realize is that he does not love Jesus at all but instead hates him! Through the readings of Nietzsche it is clear that he had a deep hatred for Christians, and spoke many evil and slanderous things about Christians and God. The act of Nietzsche hating Christians proves that he hates Jesus too."


"i want to question nietzche. what if one of my ways of living life to the fullest is charity? and well, i can be an existentialist even if i believe in God. I think these existentialists should consider the different mindsets of people. lol."


"Nietzsche was a demented retard."


"Would you say 'Santa Cluas is dead' or 'the Easter Bunny is dead'? No. God will never die because you can’t kill imagination and God is the king of the imaginarium."


"I wouldn’t call Nietzsche a philosopher of genius, but a real klutz, second rate."


"Christian, and Buddhist are alway quite ridiculous views, but Nietzsche is a moron. A lot of Morons uses Nietzsche to give other people that impression that they are not morons. This is why i hate the fucker( Nietzsche) so ******* much."


"Nietzsche was retarded and probably stupid and deserved to die."


APOLOGIES FOR FITFUL UPDATES RECENTLY. SHOULD BE BACK TO OUR REGULAR SCHEDULE IN ABOUT A WEEK AND A HALF.

Thursday, April 4, 2013

Lewis Carroll - Alice's Adventures in Wonderland V

"Bad book never read it it is only for girls"


"Unlike most sixteen year olds, I enjoy a good old novel written back when books were truly forms of art ... However, this book was a total waste of my weekend. Alice, to no end, annoyed me the second she opened her mouth. All she does in Wonderland is complain and whine and talk about her God-forsaken cat.

On a side note, what the heck kind of a name for a cat is Dinah? Did people wait until the 2000s to start using names like Boots or Fluffy?
...
Also, the characters are hard to follow. I know it's near impossible to relate to a talking rabbit, but I was hoping for some grounding point, some plot to follow. There was absolutely none. I found myself relieved when I finished the book and could move onto something else more entertaining. Honestly, if anyone reading this review is thinking about reading the book, don't. Take my word for it, there are books more worthy of your time than this one."


"I understand this is literature, and I appreciate for that. But seriously-wth?"


"It's a 'classic' so I read it. Doesn't mean I actually enjoyed it, maybe if I'd read it as a child with that child mindset I may have liked it but not so much as an adult.

It's haphazard and directionless and I don't believe that even my childhood dreams where so incohesive.

Nope, I didn't enjoy it."


"As an English teacher, this might come as a rather surprising view. I could not find a deeper layer of meaning to the novel & really my impressions sum up to this: CS Lewis was on drugs when he wrote it, CS Lewis had a fascination with narcotics (the constant shrinking, growing, sniffing, references to mushrooms), CS Lewis could be interpreted as a peodophile (controversial I know but there's room for interpretation), the plot & characters lack depth neither do they make sense :(.

I'm baffled as to why this is a classic. I even went in sparknotes to see what analysis was written and interpretations made; for me they are rather far-fetched & personally applied poorly. But hey, maybe you need to be stoned to appreciate this or a different kind of 'intellectual'."


"I've never taken illegal drugs, but I imagine that if I did, and wrote a book while under the influence, it would read like this one. Somehow, we made it through, my kids and I, reading this every morning for a loooooong series of weeks."

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

J. M. Synge - The Playboy of the Western World

"Boring!!!!!!!"


"Written in a half-witted patois by a shameless halfwit, for an audience of halfwits."


"Why would you hire a man who just confessed to killing his own father to guard your daughter and keep her company while away on business?

WHY

They are even happy about leaving the girl alone with a murderer - I don’t get it…
#JM Synge #english lit #uni life #irish novels #is it because they're irish?"