"This was the worst book that I have ever read in my entire life."
"This book definitely seems to be one of those all-American books about America in the 19th century that would be seen in a lot of American Literature classes."
"I started reading this over a month ago and I'm still not finished. I can't get into it at all! It's like a really boring nightmare! I mean, the parts that take place at Satis House are mildly interesting, but no part of it seems to be building up to anything. The story moves so slowly that at times you'd swear it wasn't moving at all, and, to be sure, at times, it isn't! It's just sitting there in its stupid rocking chair knitting and petting its cat by the fire, which isn't even burning! OMG!
You want to read something fast paced and interesting?
Try Daniel White's Hellstone, available right here at amazon.com (plug). Now that's a good book. White's influences span the ages, and don't skip Victorian, if that's what you're into, which you obviously are, or why would you be here?
Don't get me wrong. I like Victorian literature. A Christmas Carol is a very good story, as is Dracula, and Frankenstein, and most of Poe's works. It's just this particular book that I don't like...and anything by Jane Austen.
In conclusion, buy Hellstone. You'll be happy you did."
"The fact that Pip found his Great Expectations and then only becomes a snob afterwards upset me. Where's the morals to that."
"I can tell the reader of this review that I am not a Charles Dicken's fan..I truly believe that he is a pig of a man and was mandated to read this book for a college lit class. Otherwise, I find his work to be over-rated in importance."
"This book was literally the worst thing thats happened in my whole entire life.
...
THIS BOOK WAS HORRIBLE!!!!!!!!!
The only GOOD thing about this book is that I hav found a new way to doze off without sum sleeping pills (just read the first two pages and WALLA ure fast asleep!!!!!!!)"
"all the classics always in my opinion, are very bad"
"A poll was taken and about 73% of the students in the school liked this book. What does that show about the book?"
"If i were to recommend this to anybody i would recommend it to adults who like lots of detail, lots of connections, and olden day talking."
"The concept of the book vaguely reminded me of other 'old world' movies and books that I know, like 'Pride and Prejudice' or 'Sense and Sensibility.' The concept of gaining riches, through marriage or 'great expectations.' A lot of older material tend to follow this idea, mostly because that was society then."
"If they cut it down by 300 pages they could still get the whole story in and it would likely be better-at least for me."
"dickens...i'd love you if you weren't so old fashioned. how do you expect me to relate to old-timey london society dude? those suckers didn't even tv."
"I saw part of the movie and it was REALLY weird. I would not suggest either the book or the movie."
"On my home planet of Mars, books that we do not enjoy, we refer to as lunch. We had 'Great Expectations' before the matinee last week. The matinee was 'Smoky the Cowhorse.' It was Martian Thanksgiving, so 'Awful (great (yeah right!)) Expectations' was a good choice, because it is so freakin' long, and low in cholesterol. I am on a strictly bad classics diet. The Martian Major Leagues starts today, so I grilled a warthog.
One of the reasons that I found this book (in terms of literature, not food) so disturbing is because the Martian term for a hemmohroid is a pip. In terms of food, it could have used a bit more seasoning, like a trip to Denmark. Of course, they didn't actually go to Denmark. If instead of being named 'Magwitch' the convict had been called Bozo the Clown, and gave Pip balloon animals instead of money, I would have enjoyed the book much more.
But, the thing that ticked me off the most (and Auntie, too!) was the way that Dickens never ended his sentences: instead, he just ran them on and on and on and on and punctuated them only with commas and semicolons, as if to say, 'this is my book, feel free to fall asleep; or, you could eat it': that reminds me of a very funny story about a man named 'Kitty'...
WHACK!
(Auntie just hit me over my other head with a frying pan). The truth is... the only good part about this book is when Miss Havisham (the Martian) gets married to Pip. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! HA.
Ha."
Monday, September 5, 2011
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Charles Dickens - Great Expectations II
"Out of date"
"Too many words"
"Many of the sentences would be considered run-on today."
"But the one thing that absolutely ruins this book is the clutter of coincidences. One of the first rules of fiction writing is NO COINCIDENCES. And Dickens goes out of his way to break this rule. Over. And Over. And Over."
"Not to mention the characters are just plaing weird. Where in the world did Dickens get a bizarre lady like Miss Havisham, who is practically ill in the head?"
"Charles Dickens wrote a novel about a boy who had a hard life, and in the end he was happy....Big Deal!"
"if Estella hit me like she did pip, I would have hit her back!! All the women in this book seem like stuck up b****es!"
"I have never read a more stupendesely boring book.It's a revered book but it lacks everything that makes a book truly great.It's poorly written,uninteresting,the characters are unlikable,there is very little theme or characterization,the plot is virtually non-existent.The chapters are so meandering and pointless you have to force yourself to read it.English students shouldn't have to suffer by being made read this incomprehensible,boring, overrated 'novel'.I'd rather watch paint dry than read this book again.Still,any insomniacs looking for a cure,this book's for you."
"I think Charles Dickens was not a smart man for writing
this book. He could have summed the book up a lot. He used
long word that some times were had to say."
"ZZZZZZZ SNOOZE ZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!"
"As far as the story is concerned, the 300 pages is crap.
I said it. Don't gasp.
...
Why is it that academics pick these boring books that can't tell stories as part of the western canon? I love reading classics, thanks, but THIS?
...
His prose is dense, sprawling, and unseemly as sentences are connected by ugly semicolons and don't flow beautifully at all.
...
Yuck.
People are irresistibly drawn to anything related to themselves. I have a sneaking suspicion that the academics who bill this book as 'most fascinating' and 'greatest and most sophisticated work' see THEIR prominent characteristic in it."
"Have low expectations when you read 'Great Expectations.' Modern books have much faster pacing and are more easy to read."
"Second question Where in his warped imagination did he get Ms. Havishom? News flash! Anyone who did so many terrible things because a man left her was mentally unstable before she met the jerk which explains why he left her. Oh and one more thing if your a feminists (like me) this book will get you upset enough. The only women in the book are either crazy old hags or out right bitches. It certainly says a lot about male Victorian sensibilities!!"
"By far the worst literary blunder the world has ever excreted. I would never wish this horific mass of boredom upon anyone. Avoid this book like the black plauge (another one of Europe's tragedies)."
"Funking exelen!
i havent read it yet but it shows diskousting:)I hate this book and i hope my mates of aal help me finisk it.Chill out"
"Put simply, Great Expectations is a wordy, convuluted, and overrated peice of trash. Written originally in different volumes and distributed to an excited Victorian republic, Dickens was able to make his audience care and feel for his odd, moving characters. He was the Stephen King of his day; a clever businessman who distributed mediocre books to the public. That Dicken's fever passed on from one generation to the next is fine, that this made Dicken's books classics in schools is a shame. But let me get to the actual book at hand! Yes, many characters in Great Expectations are original and interseting. Overall, however, Great Expectations is wordy (!), and painfully convoluted. It is often difficult to get through, and geared towards a certain audience only. This is not to say that everyone will dislike Great Expectations, but we live in an age (good or bad) of gritty realism ... Anyone who wants to live in a former era, Great Expectations is a must; for anyone who wants a powerful, sophisticated read PLEASE put Great Expectations in the incinerator."
"I honestly try to appreciate what is *supposed* to be fine literature, but 'Great Expectations' is about as entertaining as watching kale grow. First off, the fact that this book has two endings inspires a bit of skepticism in me. I've never heard of an author so indecisive that he would put two endings in a novel. It creates a generally unsatisfying conclusion, as you're at a loss for which ending to 'accept'."
"Who cares about Wemmick's stupid plays?"
"I hate this novel with a passion so great it scares even me. I'd like to see all copies burned. Okay, not really. That's a little extreme. But, at least take this garbage out of school curriculums. Its' making us stupid, making us believe Pip's world is what the world really is. Pip if a fool that got dumped too many times and where's the sex. Was Dickens scared of it. I believe that all great novels should have sex in them. It brings some humanity to them . Great Expectations is a fantasy on level with the Bible but worse, tragicly worse."
"I give you a generous TWO STARS this time Charlie! Youre getting there so keep trying!"
"This book was a very big disappontmet. I thought this book could have had a couple minor plot changes. I also thought the way the main charictor, Pip, transfored through his expectations was shallow and padanthic. To conclude, I belive that the chapters are cycled like story line with many charictors and an entire chapter with Pip talking to himself and talking about his expectations. Thank you for reading my review."
"Too many words"
"Many of the sentences would be considered run-on today."
"But the one thing that absolutely ruins this book is the clutter of coincidences. One of the first rules of fiction writing is NO COINCIDENCES. And Dickens goes out of his way to break this rule. Over. And Over. And Over."
"Not to mention the characters are just plaing weird. Where in the world did Dickens get a bizarre lady like Miss Havisham, who is practically ill in the head?"
"Charles Dickens wrote a novel about a boy who had a hard life, and in the end he was happy....Big Deal!"
"if Estella hit me like she did pip, I would have hit her back!! All the women in this book seem like stuck up b****es!"
"I have never read a more stupendesely boring book.It's a revered book but it lacks everything that makes a book truly great.It's poorly written,uninteresting,the characters are unlikable,there is very little theme or characterization,the plot is virtually non-existent.The chapters are so meandering and pointless you have to force yourself to read it.English students shouldn't have to suffer by being made read this incomprehensible,boring, overrated 'novel'.I'd rather watch paint dry than read this book again.Still,any insomniacs looking for a cure,this book's for you."
"I think Charles Dickens was not a smart man for writing
this book. He could have summed the book up a lot. He used
long word that some times were had to say."
"ZZZZZZZ SNOOZE ZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!"
"As far as the story is concerned, the 300 pages is crap.
I said it. Don't gasp.
...
Why is it that academics pick these boring books that can't tell stories as part of the western canon? I love reading classics, thanks, but THIS?
...
His prose is dense, sprawling, and unseemly as sentences are connected by ugly semicolons and don't flow beautifully at all.
...
Yuck.
People are irresistibly drawn to anything related to themselves. I have a sneaking suspicion that the academics who bill this book as 'most fascinating' and 'greatest and most sophisticated work' see THEIR prominent characteristic in it."
"Have low expectations when you read 'Great Expectations.' Modern books have much faster pacing and are more easy to read."
"Second question Where in his warped imagination did he get Ms. Havishom? News flash! Anyone who did so many terrible things because a man left her was mentally unstable before she met the jerk which explains why he left her. Oh and one more thing if your a feminists (like me) this book will get you upset enough. The only women in the book are either crazy old hags or out right bitches. It certainly says a lot about male Victorian sensibilities!!"
"By far the worst literary blunder the world has ever excreted. I would never wish this horific mass of boredom upon anyone. Avoid this book like the black plauge (another one of Europe's tragedies)."
"Funking exelen!
i havent read it yet but it shows diskousting:)I hate this book and i hope my mates of aal
"Put simply, Great Expectations is a wordy, convuluted, and overrated peice of trash. Written originally in different volumes and distributed to an excited Victorian republic, Dickens was able to make his audience care and feel for his odd, moving characters. He was the Stephen King of his day; a clever businessman who distributed mediocre books to the public. That Dicken's fever passed on from one generation to the next is fine, that this made Dicken's books classics in schools is a shame. But let me get to the actual book at hand! Yes, many characters in Great Expectations are original and interseting. Overall, however, Great Expectations is wordy (!), and painfully convoluted. It is often difficult to get through, and geared towards a certain audience only. This is not to say that everyone will dislike Great Expectations, but we live in an age (good or bad) of gritty realism ... Anyone who wants to live in a former era, Great Expectations is a must; for anyone who wants a powerful, sophisticated read PLEASE put Great Expectations in the incinerator."
"I honestly try to appreciate what is *supposed* to be fine literature, but 'Great Expectations' is about as entertaining as watching kale grow. First off, the fact that this book has two endings inspires a bit of skepticism in me. I've never heard of an author so indecisive that he would put two endings in a novel. It creates a generally unsatisfying conclusion, as you're at a loss for which ending to 'accept'."
"Who cares about Wemmick's stupid plays?"
"I hate this novel with a passion so great it scares even me. I'd like to see all copies burned. Okay, not really. That's a little extreme. But, at least take this garbage out of school curriculums. Its' making us stupid, making us believe Pip's world is what the world really is. Pip if a fool that got dumped too many times and where's the sex. Was Dickens scared of it. I believe that all great novels should have sex in them. It brings some humanity to them . Great Expectations is a fantasy on level with the Bible but worse, tragicly worse."
"I give you a generous TWO STARS this time Charlie! Youre getting there so keep trying!"
"This book was a very big disappontmet. I thought this book could have had a couple minor plot changes. I also thought the way the main charictor, Pip, transfored through his expectations was shallow and padanthic. To conclude, I belive that the chapters are cycled like story line with many charictors and an entire chapter with Pip talking to himself and talking about his expectations. Thank you for reading my review."
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Charles Dickens - Great Expectations
"Best to get someone else to sum up the story rather than undergo the torture of reading it."
"I wouldn't even wipe my ass with this."
"I don't get it! What's to like? The story centres around a completely unlikable twit and a stone cold bitch, surrounded by a further cast of such extreme eccentrics that you're left wondering where all the *normal* people went."
"By the time I was finished with this book I had nothing but bad thoughts for the author. My favorite of which was, 'I hope he's burning in hell and they're using his shitty book to feed the flames.' I may just be an angry child, but man, I abhor this book."
"oh my god i hate this book with all my heart and soul. whenever it comes up in conversation and someone hasn't read it i immediately spoil the ending to save them the trouble."
"Memo to Mr. Dickens: Why do I care if they had three different kinds of meat at dinner? Tell me more about why that one dude was looking at the maid THAT way all through the meal. Come on!"
"No one should be exposed to such boring and subversive writing"
"I had a great deal of difficulty since the words and the language used are just to difficult. You can slash at the book but you just won't get inside and fell that you're there. Just the parts in Pip's house make sleep and Joe well makes me sick!. It's ok but don't pick it up if you want a quick read. If you can't get the Isabela you desperate boy Pip then stop trying since you'll newver will!!!"
"Gag me with a stick. I quite frankly think Dickens like to hear his work read aloud."
"I literally decided to home school because I didn't want to finish this in preparation for ninth grade honors English. Seriously."
"This honestly has to be one of the worst books I've ever read. Written in the usual BritLit style, it loops around the same idea constantly so that when you reach the end nothing has happened and you've really learned nothing except for how much time you've wasted of your life."
"Pip and Miss Havisham are both bitches. I hate them both."
"throughout that entire novel i wished pip a terrible death"
"Everything about Pip makes me feel twitchy and violent. I actually pulled out my thesaurus for this review because "stupid" just didn't do him justice. The protagonist is an obtuse, pussy-whipped, daft idiot who never outgrows himself. Why was he so static? Were ANY of the characters likable in any way?"
"He's a whiny, self-important brat who thinks he's too good for those around him through the whole book. No wonder my young self couldn't stand him--he was incapable of learning a thing."
"I wanted to thrash him with my gold-headed sword-cane."
"Why can't we read Mitch Albom? There's just as many life lessons there as in Charles Dickens' book!"
"I hat Dickens, I hate Dickens, I hate Dickens. Ponderous, bloated, diseased ramblings of a very disturbed individual. Ugh."
"If you are thinking that I am not intellectually advanced enough to appreciate this fine art, then you are a follower. Try to think for yourself sometimes. Bye-bye."
"I wouldn't even wipe my ass with this."
"I don't get it! What's to like? The story centres around a completely unlikable twit and a stone cold bitch, surrounded by a further cast of such extreme eccentrics that you're left wondering where all the *normal* people went."
"By the time I was finished with this book I had nothing but bad thoughts for the author. My favorite of which was, 'I hope he's burning in hell and they're using his shitty book to feed the flames.' I may just be an angry child, but man, I abhor this book."
"oh my god i hate this book with all my heart and soul. whenever it comes up in conversation and someone hasn't read it i immediately spoil the ending to save them the trouble."
"Memo to Mr. Dickens: Why do I care if they had three different kinds of meat at dinner? Tell me more about why that one dude was looking at the maid THAT way all through the meal. Come on!"
"No one should be exposed to such boring and subversive writing"
"I had a great deal of difficulty since the words and the language used are just to difficult. You can slash at the book but you just won't get inside and fell that you're there. Just the parts in Pip's house make sleep and Joe well makes me sick!. It's ok but don't pick it up if you want a quick read. If you can't get the Isabela you desperate boy Pip then stop trying since you'll newver will!!!"
"Gag me with a stick. I quite frankly think Dickens like to hear his work read aloud."
"I literally decided to home school because I didn't want to finish this in preparation for ninth grade honors English. Seriously."
"This honestly has to be one of the worst books I've ever read. Written in the usual BritLit style, it loops around the same idea constantly so that when you reach the end nothing has happened and you've really learned nothing except for how much time you've wasted of your life."
"Pip and Miss Havisham are both bitches. I hate them both."
"throughout that entire novel i wished pip a terrible death"
"Everything about Pip makes me feel twitchy and violent. I actually pulled out my thesaurus for this review because "stupid" just didn't do him justice. The protagonist is an obtuse, pussy-whipped, daft idiot who never outgrows himself. Why was he so static? Were ANY of the characters likable in any way?"
"He's a whiny, self-important brat who thinks he's too good for those around him through the whole book. No wonder my young self couldn't stand him--he was incapable of learning a thing."
"I wanted to thrash him with my gold-headed sword-cane."
"Why can't we read Mitch Albom? There's just as many life lessons there as in Charles Dickens' book!"
"I hat Dickens, I hate Dickens, I hate Dickens. Ponderous, bloated, diseased ramblings of a very disturbed individual. Ugh."
"If you are thinking that I am not intellectually advanced enough to appreciate this fine art, then you are a follower. Try to think for yourself sometimes. Bye-bye."
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